I grew up with cats, From Koota to Jack, there wasn’t a moment spent under mom and dad’s roof without a feline presence. The love of cats always seems to be a polarizing issue. As taboo as rooting for the Mets AND the Yankess, most people feel the need to pick a side. How anyone can root against anything that’s furry with four legs is beyond me. However, there are several observations about cat ownership that I would like to share.

If you own MORE THAN THREE CATS, you are likely:

• WEIRD. Relax, being different is a good thing.

• HYGIENICALLY CHALLENGED. We’ll blame it on all that little and kibble.

• UNMARRIED. And if you are, you’re not having much sex.

• DEMOCRATIC. This might have something to do with the fact you might be Jewish.

• CHARITABLE. The no-kill shelter gets a $50; the American Cancer Society solicitation goes in the trash.

• A PBS WATCHER. Admit it, you own the tote bag.

By “own” I mean these cats live under your roof full time. I’m not talking about the cats that mosey on by for some soft food.

Any person who cares for an animal is coolio. But in my experience, folks who own more than three tend to assign magical properties to their animals.

“Lucky gives my hugs and kisses when I’m sick”
“Delilah gets sad when she sees my suitcase”
“Schmookie was depressed when you left”

Of course, you also could have your parents refer to the cats as your siblings.

Before you start providing me with examples of how cats can save lives and warn their human friends of impending disaster, I ask you to ask yourself: How many hours a day do you talk to your cat? My guess is north of an hour.

In summary, there are three types of people in this world:

People with less than three cats
People with more than three cats
People with no cats at all

It’s the group in the middle that are usually easy to identify.

Do you think there’s any truth to The Three Cat Rule?

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