Between local Wi-Fi hotspots and wireless broadband connections, we’re being conditioned to believe that the Web is accessible anytime, anywhere. Surely we can connect in more ways than ever before, but it is possible to hit a dead end.

The other night at my temporary residence, I was searching for a way to connect; to no avail.

While in some circles I’m the typical new-age computer geek with white ear buds, dark-framed glasses and collared shirt, in this instance, I was a helpless technophobe.

Here’s how I failed. And here’s why you’ll never catch me without a modem again.

CABLE CONNECTION. Requires equipment, a contract and a human being to step foot inside (not an option an my current location). STRIKE ONE.

DSL CONNECTION. Verizon had the line activated and the model shipped within 24 hours. Impressive. That was until I attempted to connect. After 90 minutes on the phone with India, it was determined that the line was no good and that a technician would have to be dispatched. STRIKE TWO.

WIRELESS BROADBAND. Minimum of a one-year contract. No dice. STRIKE THREE.

CELL PHONE AS MODEM. I own the LG enV, which despite it’s absolute awesomeness, cannot be used as a modem. This means I would have to upgrade my phone to the LG Dare, Slyder, or similar phone-as-a-modem capabilities. STRIKE FOUR.

SEARCH FOR WIRELESS. Darn neighbors are all password protected. STRIKE FIVE.

So there I was, alone in my room with a connection. When I ordered my last two computers I left out the modem in lieu of some Ethernet ports. Consider the lesson learned. It might be slow and clunky, but it’s not yet completely antiquated. From now on, have modem, will travel.

Related Articles

• What Do You Do if Your Dishwasher Breaks?
• Is Nothing Sacred?
• Top 20 Jacks. No.1- Jack Nicholson
• Hold On to Your Utterz!
• Mr.Bloggy Starts 2007 with a Bang
• How not to deal with your design firm (TechCrunch Edition)
• Five Steps to Dealing With Blogovers