Four Things You Can Do to Become a Blog Sidekick

January 27th, 2006 Posted by Sidekick under Blogging, Blogs, Useless Reading

Well, the cards and letters are pouring in. “Sidekick,? they say, “how can I land a sweet gig like yours??

It’s not easy, amigos. But here’s four things you can do to increase your chances:

1.Fawn and Flatter – Make sure to cater to your Bloglord’s ego. Tell him he’s right, even when he’s off on a fucking self-destructive tangent again.

2.Personal Favors – Lattes, dry cleaning, driving strippers home the next morning… make yourself useful.

3.Take the Bullet – It’s always going to be your fault anyway, so go ahead and preemptively take the blame. For everything.

4.Ease the Burden – Blogging is hard. Alleviate the drudgery for the boss by reading feeds, doing research and other mundane stuff, like stringing words together into sentences. You know, the grunt work.

Bonus Tip Number Five: If you want to keep your job as a blog sidekick, never be tempted to participate in boring pseudo memes just to fit in. It’s a career killer.

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9 feisty cowboys

  1. I nominate this for best post on this blog for 2006 that I didn’t write. You are fucking awesome. Now where is my fucking Charbucks already?

    Cowboy said this on January 27, 2006 9:41 am

  2. I’m on the way. Got the aspirin for your, uhh… “headache” too. I’m having a little trouble with task #3 though. You know, as Dave Attell says: “Aspirin does a lot of things, but it won’t bring a dead hooker back to life.”

    Sidekick said this on January 27, 2006 10:40 am

  3. listen “sidekick”...as far as I’m concerned there’s only one meme that anyone should be doing.

    meme said this on January 27, 2006 10:56 am

  4. I would have to second that… if i ever got the fucking chance. you never call me back.

    Cowboy said this on January 27, 2006 10:59 am

  5. Oh meme, please don’t tease. The only reason I put up with Krug’s dicKtatorial (heh) tendencies is for the opportunity to come to NYC and lay eyes on you in person.

    Sidekick said this on January 27, 2006 11:04 am

  6. Sorry, I stumbled into a private chatroom.

    Bastards ;)

    Chris P. said this on January 28, 2006 10:22 am

  7. ahahha. it seems like that sometimes.

    Cowboy said this on January 28, 2006 10:58 am

  8. Yep, and like most chatrooms, this one is a timberfest.

    Where the hell are Meme and all of those cute girlspokes she hangs with?

    Sidekick said this on January 28, 2006 12:21 pm

  9. I heard they all diddle each other on Saturdays. Supposedly they’re coming out with the next “We Live Together” website.

    I dunno about you, but my fingers are crossed.

    The Deuce said this on January 28, 2006 12:59 pm

What do you think?